April 29th: Save the Date!

 They're back!

All My Children and One Life to Live have recently gone back into production and the premiere date has been set for April 29th!

Since I'm always doing something online, I've noticed that there's been some confusion regarding the venue and access to these shows. So I wanted to clear some things up:

• These shows will be available on Hulu, Hulu Plus and iTunes.

• Hulu is FREE. You do not need an account to access the shows and you will be able to watch the episodes anytime after they are uploaded. I'm unsure how long they'll keep each episode, but their usual modus operandi is that they keep the last five episodes available, which gives you a few days to watch them.

• When you go onto the site, do not go to the Hulu Plus link, just type in the name of the show you are looking for in the search box and it will take you to the right page.

• To get the free streaming version you need a laptop or regular computer. Hulu will not play on mobile devices or tablets.

• Hulu Plus is $7.99 a month. No information has been released yet, but it is assumed that this version will have a larger back catalog of episodes. Also, Hulu Plus streams through Roku and other devices, meaning you can watch AMC and OLTL on your television if you have one of these gadgets.

• Right now there isn't much info available for iTunes, but I did check out the Days of Our Lives page and when you break down the season pass by episode, it's el cheapo (it's something like $15 for 20 episodes). Here are the links to the iTunes pages for One Life to Live and All My Children.

Today, both All My Children and One Life to Live released trailers for their upcoming revivals. Spoiler: They are amazing:

All My Children:       One Life to Live:  
The episodes will be 30 minutes long and there will be new episodes uploaded from Monday - Thursday. Friday's episode will be recaps.

While some of the actors could not come back due to other commitments, both shows got a lot of core characters, and the crews are heavily compromised of soap vets. Also, Agnes Nixon, the lady who created both AMC and OLTL was brought on board to help create the path these shows will go. Yes, it's OK to say Yay!

With regards to the "General Hospital 3" (the title refers to the three characters who moved from OLTL to GH after it was cancelled), there has been a lot of speculation, but no official word has come from either camp regarding the future of the characters or actors. I think at this stage, we can assume that Michael Easton (John McBain) and Kristen Alderson (Starr Manning) will probably be assuming new characters on GH, but Roger Howarth (the hunky, funky Todd Manning) is shooting several episodes of OLTL right now... as we speak! I'm not sure what this means for Roger the actor or Todd the character. What I think we all want is what the actors want, but let's just get one thing clear... These characters were bought by Prospect Park, and they are new to this and of course want the legacy characters on the canvas. They loaned these three popular characters to GH as a way to keep the show fresh in people's mind while they sought financing for their own venture. They also did not try to hold onto Frank Valenti, who was OLTL's executive producer, or Ron Carlivati, OLTL's head writer, and let them move over the GH in February of 2012. Since Frank and Ron, lovingly referred to as Cartini, have made the move, GH has become nothing short of incredible. The transition was rough and not without its ups and downs (Steve Burton's exit is still being debated over), but they brought in GH's recent 50th anniversary with aplomb (and it's continuing! Don't forget to tune in!). I understand that it took some fans a while to acclimate to the OLTL characters, and I know they have been integrated well (especially Todd, a fan favorite), but I also know that Prospect Park has a lot riding on their new venture. Either way, I fully support both shows (and AMC), and I will continue to get behind these soaps regardless of what changes or who is recast as whom. I hope you do too. I mean, does anyone else remember when Blair was half-Asian?!? Yeah, that's what I'm sayin'...

OMG! Roger is so hot.

 I've been thinking a lot about the general resistance from several "fans" who won't watch shows in an online format. Today, someone posted on one of the show's facebook pages that she is old school and won't make a transition to the interwebs, like that's some kind of badge of honor. Here go my chips on the table... If anyone around here is old school, it's yours truly, and my response to her - and to all those naysayers who want to poo poo on the shows without even making one effort to give it a shot - is that it's the not the format we want to preserve, it's the storytelling. If we want to keep the genre alive, we're going to need to make adjustments.

The beautiful ladies of All My Children 2.0

 Yes, I know this format leaves out some of the older population who might not have computers, access to the web, or the ability to work a computer the way us younger bucks do. And yes, I know currently there is no outlet available for soap fans outside of the USA (however, Prospect Park is currently looking for deals in foreign markets). I don't have a response for them, except to say that the production company who is making this possible is not intentionally leaving any one out of the loop. This is the best format for the company to revive these shows. If they thought a network was interested, I'm sure they would have pursued it. As it stands, everything starts with a seed. Remember when the genre transitioned from radio to television. The episodes were 15 minutes long, and eventually, they grew into the format we know them as today. The internet will allow for some freedom, and while one of the writers from OLTL (Thomas Racina) has said things will be slightly more scandalous, no one is looking at making softcore porn. And for the record, since I'm laying it all out there for you guys, I find it somewhat silly that people are complaining about the shows being edgier. Didn't Kevin Buchanan and Kelly Cramer take an almost nude shower a few years ago? Doesn't the uber-sophisticated Erica Kane have a gazillion ex-husbands? I thought so.

From where I'm standing, we are in a wonderful place. Many of us worked very hard to get these shows back into production. Letters went to ABC, Prospect Park, advertisers, entertainment websites, you name it. Didn't someone say, if you build it, they will come? Well guys, we built it, so I'm expecting you all to show up on April 29th and let your freaky soap flags fly!

Welcome home, Agnes. We missed you.

Alien Lover Screening!

Holie Molie people! It's happened! TV movie insanity is afoot in the form of Kate Mulgrew and an, um, alien lover! The fine folks at LOOP (Lost and Out of Print) in Berkeley are screening Alien Lover along with The Visitor this Saturday, October 13th at The Tannery!

This is a must! I just recently saw Alien Lover for the first time and was pretty blown away by it. And strangely enough, I also saw The Visitor not all that long ago... And again, mind blown. What a tasty double feature. Please stop by LOOP's facebook page and likey the like. Also, you can join their event page if you will be attending this fantastic screening (or just check out their website). And I'd also like to throw out a big thank you to Ralph Razzle Razzle Roullard for turning me onto this event!
 

New Podcast's a-Comin' with Skatetown USA!

Hey everyone, I'll be stopping by the Movies About Girls podcast tomorrow night (7/21/2012) at 6 PM EST to chime in on the daddy of all roller disco movies, Skatetown USA! It is simply the wackiest thing on four wheels and it even features Patrick Swayze in an early performance (in fact, IMDb credits it as his first!). He plays the leader of an evil skate gang. 

You cannot make this stuff up, kiddos.

 So, stop by tomorrow night to catch all the disco ball glamour you can handle!

TV Movies and Art: After the Day After

Although we’ve moved on to different conflicts, it’s hard to believe we live in a world where there is no Cold War. Not just that, but there are people who have never experienced first hand that kind of looming fear such as we had during that period. The 80s seemed to be in Russia vs. America overdrive in many ways, and has been well documented in the arts. I mean c’mon, 99 Luftballoons?!? We also had several films that presented a dark, dystopian future because many of us wondered what we’d like to be if we grew up! But perhaps nothing truly captured that sense of utter destruction the way the made for TV movie The Day After did. It was 1983, and I remember the complete terror I felt just knowing it was coming on TV! It was that scary because it didn’t make us face our fears through the implication of nuclear war, it made us face our fear by showing us the actual devastation of nuclear war. Obviously, this film impacted so many of us and art filmmaker Nathan Meltz taps into his experience of watching the film when it first aired in 1983. He made a short called After the Day After, which is a scene for scene retelling of the nuclear attack told through animation. He calls it “Dada-collage-meets-stop-animation.” It’s pretty funky and sort of moves nuclear destruction into a Terminator like parallel universe. Mixing footage from the film with industrial robots conveys a never-ending cycle of destruction that begins with humans and carries on into other realms. Of course, I’m not an art student, and you should check out Nathan’s film here and decide for yourself. You can also read an interview with him here.

I'd also love to hear what you think of Nathan's film, so please feel free to comment.  



Watch the nuclear attack scene from The Day After:






While The Day After certainly resonates with so many of us, I think it would be interesting to explore these recesses of memories in other art works. Can we not envision a Bad Ronald sculpture or a stained glass Zuni Fetish Doll? Damn, I wish I were more artistic!

And finally, you can read an absolutely fantastic article about The Day After by clicking the link!

Bare Essence (1982)

Network: CBS
Original Airdate: October 4th and 5th, 1982
Oh, 1982. It was an era where the women were women and the men were too! In Bare Essence you’ve got a heterosexual fashion stylist, a machismo laden gay photographer and an uber A-sexual heir to a fortune. What a great time for romance! Or maybe I meant confusing…

Genie Francis is Tyger Hayes and her B movie director dad has just bit the big one. Her absentee mom Bobbi Rowan (the fabulous Linda Evans) shows up at the funeral and basically rubs her ferocious glamour in poor (literally) Tyger’s perfectly round face. Bobbi invites no-frills Tyger to come visit her in New York and after some convoluted business regarding her father’s last film, Tyger grabs her best duffle bag and heads to the city that never sleeps. She meets Matt Phillips (the delish Joel Higgins), fashion stylist and all around sexy stud. She assumes he’s gay. I mean, he is a stylist and pretty freakin’ good at it, so it’s like two and two, you know? However, she soon realizes he’s straight and available and very interested and off to bed they go. While attempting to secure some kind of something regarding her father’s film, she is offered a job working under the less sexy but debonair Chase Marshall (hunkadelic Bruce Boxleitner), race car driver turned business magnate. Chase lost his father around the same time Tyger lost hers and now half of his family (most notably Lee Grant who is so bitch-perfect it’s impossible to take your eyes of her) is attempting to set him up for the fall of a lifetime. But he has Tyger as a secret weapon. As Matt transforms her into a lady of style, elegance and grace, her indefatigable gumption and spunk guide her through the treacherous and fabulous world of the perfume industry, making her a faboo force to reckon with.

Pensive Tyger
Bare Essence was an extremely popular miniseries that was intended to shoot Genie, i.e. Laura Spencer from General Hospital, into prime time stardom. It had all the trappings of love in the afternoon but with a budget that could have financed several daytime shows. It was the height of glamour and the pinnacle of melodrama and of course, I loved it! It’s interesting how so many successful soaps dance with the world of fashion but don’t focus on it. The shows which did (notably Models, Inc. and Paper Dolls) were big old flops. I wonder why that is? Anyway, there’s a little Vogue-ish glamour here, but it mostly works in the boardrooms and the bedrooms. Joel Higgens is particularly giggle worthy. Who knew the father from Silver Spoons was so dang hot? OK, I've always thought he was gorgeous! Between this and his yummy performance in First Affair, I must admit, it’s love. But he’s not Tyger’s only man. There’s this wimpy French guy who she kind of manipulates and of course Chase, but none of them come close to the sexual charisma of Higgins. He was wonderful in comedies, but I think he should have played more leading men parts in soapy romances.

**Swoon**
And another word about Lee Grant - As the greedy matriarch of the Marshall clan she is an unstoppable force. Lee only graces a few scenes of the mini-series, but probably deserved a movie of her own! It’s obvious she saw the over-the-top potential of her character and she takes it to the hilt! No Regrets Grant would be her war name.

Bare Essence is a really good mini-series. I had only intended to watch the first half when I started my viewing journey, but had to take it all the way when I got snared by the glamour! I really wish television would go back to these simple, fun and romantic dramas that globetrot the world while engaging the audience with its sexy fun.

The mini-series was popular enough that it spawned a short lived television series which aired the year after. Frakes, who plays the bad boy brother stayed on, I’m assuming partly because of Genie whom he married shortly after they met during the making of the mini-series. Bare Essence, the series didn’t captivate audiences the way the network had intended and it went by the wayside. I’d really love to see the show. I can only imagine what sexy goodness awaits me there.

This lady has S-T-Y-L-E!

Lace (1984)

Network: ABC
Original Air Dates: February 26th – 27th

Oh what a twisted and, uh, lacy, web we weave when at first we practice to deceive. Ummm, yeah. Lace was one of those awesome mini-series that was full of sudsy excess, and partially responsible for making the 80s so friggin’ memorable. We’ve got beautiful woman, studly dudes, a very bitchy Phoebe Cates, an epic tale that spans decades, exotic locales and so much save-the-drama-for-your-mama-over-the-top-emotional-overload, that it was destined to become a classic.

We are, how you say, sluts...
The movie begins in the 60s and features three lovely tarts-in-the-making who are best friends at a boarding school in the Alps. We’ve got Pagan (Brooke Adams) who is this semi-comuppity British chick, there’s Maxine (Arielle Dombasle) a beautiful French girl who resembles Jenny Wright from Near Dark and Judy (Bess Armstrong in that famous pageboy she’s had for a zillion and a half years), the smart American girl. Each one loses their virginity around the same time and guess what? One ends up with a bun in the oven. So the trio vow to have it together, give it up together and then fetch the child when one of them can get into a better situation and raise it properly. The first half of the movie basically sets up the mystery of who the mother could be and then after the unnamed vixen gives birth, we follow the three girls as they separate and pursue their own dreams. The child is named Elizabeth Lace and the mother is put on record as Lucinda Lace (harkening back to a romance novel the three women loved).

Oh Pagan, you know you want it...
Well, life is just too damn good for these women - Pagan has an on-again-off-again romance with a middle eastern prince, Maxine marries this hot guy who has an incredible house, and then she has her own kid (or another kid, depending on your opinion at this point), and Judy goes to Viet Nam to report on the war, decides it sucks and then starts a magazine called Lace. They all keep coming up with excuses for leaving Elizabeth where she is and then one day they get the (wrong) information that she’s been killed. Of course, everyone feels all bad and stuff, but eventually they resume their lives pretty much as normal. Eventually means, like, five minutes later, but with some offset resentment and stuff (for the drama, dig?)... Then this wickedly bitter porn star turned A List actress named Lili (Cates, slinging an indistinguishable Euor-trash accent) shows up and begins to assimilate herself into their lives, in the most cold and cruel ways. She seduces Maxine’s son (or her own brother, depending on you opinion at this point... Yikes!), hurls Pagan back into the prince’s life only to jerk him away and, well, she gives Judy a pretty awesome interview for Lace. Well, that’ll teach her! Finally, she brings the three now-distant friends together and asks them, “Which one of you bitches is my mother?”

My friends, history has been made.



And now we can move on to… Lace: Volume II

Volume II continues exactly where the “which one of you bitches is my mother?” part leaves off. Again we track back through everyone’s life (although at this point Lili’s story is mostly done with dialog and less with flashbacks) and then there’s the money shot. You mean, she’s your mom?!? OK, I didn’t guess it at first, but right before the reveal, it does become fairly obvious.

"Wheech one of you beetches ees my muther?"
Volume II isn’t quite as much fun because at this point you’re just waiting around for whatever the revelation may be, but it’s a decent ending to the bang up, lush soapy extravaganza of Volume I. Bess Armstrong is terrific here as Judy and my favorite of the three girls. As a war correspondent she sucks, but she ends up writing a book called Rape in a Foxhole, which I’m simply dying to read! I think they spend a bit too much time on Pagan and her prince saga, but the locales are simply delish and of course Brooke Adams is in top form, especially at the beginning of her romance, before she hits the frumpy route. Now Phoebe Cates is another story. She’s simply breathtaking to look at but seems so lost in the role, not even a GPS could lead her to right side of her character. She’s so hilariously indignant! Nothing pleases her and as she emotes from one bitch session to the next, she’s just like taffeta gone mad. And I loved her!

This is Judy apparently going undercover as an airline stewardess
This mini-series was popular enough to warrant a sequel, aptly titled Lace II (but maybe it should have been Lace II: Volume I or Lace: Volume III or… oh, I’m so confused!)… In the sequel (which I have not seen... yet) Lili goes looking for her father! I mean, we kind of know who he is, right? Guess again...

Lace starts off strong, stays engrossing through the first three hours and then wanes into something slightly less engaging (not counting Cates’ ill advised bitch moments), before heading into the world of nothingness. It was a nice ride though, and of course being the glutton for 80s excess that I am, I’d take that trip again any day!

A Gallery of Bitch:

























From People Archives:

Deceptions (1985)

Network: NBC
Original Air Date: May 27th, 1985

What could be better than a mini-series with Stefanie Powers?

How about a mini-series with two Stefanie Powers. I kid you not.

From Not-So-Fab:




To Tres-Fab:



The end result (and a nice split screen!):



Stefanie plays Sabrina (Breenie) and Stephanie, twin sisters who have taken two very different paths in life. Stephanie has settled down and had two kids with her hunky college professor hubby Grant (Barry Bostwick, who is amazing as usual). Her life consists of a seemingly loveless marriage, a part time job at the college bookstore and tending to her young children, one of whom has recently taken up stealing (Jason Miller from Growing Pains. The daughter is played by an extremely young Faruza Balk). She's thrilled when her much more sophisticated sister, Sabrina flies her to Venice for their birthday. On the outside, Breenie is quite enviable with her art collecting gig, closet full of designer clothes, plenty of suitors and a big ol' giant house with a staff! OK, so maybe her life is pretty good. But ask Breenie about it and you're certain to get another answer. This lovely lady has gotten herself mixed up with the seedier side of London's posh scene and finds she is basically a kept woman for the local mobster. He heads out of town for a month, while Breenie and Stephanie head toVenice and hatch their "harmless" scheme... to switch places.

Fabio Testi, a monkey and an ass! Love it!

So off they go, Breenie becomes a housewife (and has a knack for it!) and Stephanie runs around London with one of Breenie's old suitors (played by the gorgeous Fabio Testi from Nothing Underneath). After a car accident, which leaves Breenie bruised, she and Stephanie opt to keep the fantasy up for just a bit longer... but as more time passes while playing this game, the less enticing returning home to suburbia becomes to Stephanie. Then Breenie's mobster boyfriend returns and things take a turn for the worse.

Deceptions is like all of your favorite night time soaps on a more epic level. The scenes in London and Venice are amazing to look at. Gina Lolobriggida plays Princess Alessandra, which should give you a nice clue to how glamorous this movie is. And it's a ton of fun. I put it on expecting to only watch the first half in one sitting and then finish it later. But I watched this little bit of eye candy from beginning to end in one go. Stefanie is great as both girls and gives each just a touch of difference so you can see why someone would confuse them, but you're also aware of each of their unique personalities.

My God! I'm gorgeous!

And it's so... 1985. The wardrobe is awesome to behold and the music! Oh, the music! The opening song features "I'm So Excited," by the Pointer Sisters, which sets the pacing for this fun ride. I love a little opulence, but 80s opulence?!? Well, it was just never done better!

And what a great way to twist the escapist "fantasy" so many of us have of a world full of caviar dreams (thank you, Robin Leach!). The lucky girl is the one who realizes that life with a college professor and a couple of kids is far more rewarding than one built on great style, hot men and money. We know that's not true, but what a sweet thought, no?

Jeremy Brett as a gay guy... No one will buy it!